I come from a very athletic family. My mom does triathlons and CrossFit competitions. My sister recently rode her bike 4,000 miles across America. Meanwhile, I occasionally work up a sweat blow-drying my hair.
Clearly I’m no fitness buff, but I do take my health very seriously. Being fit and feeling good are important to me because all I want in life is to be hot and live forever. It’s not too much to ask.
The problem is that most “workouts” are just insanely boring to me. I have no concept of a “runner’s high” or desire to figure it out. The idea of walking laps around some dilapidated high school track makes me wanna never leave my sofa. I have never in my life woken up and thought, “Ah, yes. Great day to really push my body to its limits!” And I likely never will.
Instead, I stay fit and active in stealthier ways. If I’m going to stay healthy, I’m gonna have to trick my body into it and that’s OK. Here are the sneaky ways I work fitness into my daily routines.
1. Have At Least One Solo Dance Party Per Day
Several times per day, I turn to my “Work It” playlist, which, yes, does feature Missy Elliot’s seminal classic, “Work It.” I like to start my day with some high-octane pop-dance music (think Robyn, Britney, Bey, Tay) and get a good 10 to 15 minutes of energetic “dancing” (semi-rhythmic jumping) in to kickstart my cardio. Embarrassingly gyrating in your kitchen to “Toxic” is the new coffee, y’all.
Throughout the day, I take 20 to 25 minute breaks to dance every couple hours. These solo dance parties get my heart rate up and help clear my mind, which is helpful when you sit at a desk and write for eight to nine hours each day. Try and sneak some workout moves, like squats or jumping jacks, into your dance every now and then. Look at that. You exercised. Shake it off.
2. Go (Read: Walk) For A Drink Or A Bite With A Friend
When dancing can’t do the trick, sometimes you have to get out of the house/office. Go for a long walk on your lunch break or when you’re done for the day. Sometimes it’s helpful to be walking to something, rather than just walking for walking’s sake. I like to find a bar or restaurant that’s three to four miles away and walk briskly to it, reward myself with a snack or cocktail, and then walk back. This is a fun workout to do with someone and an easy way to sneak five to ten miles of walking into your day!
3. Move Around While You Watch TV
Like Kenneth Parcell, there are only two things I love in this world--everybody and television. TV is the perfect distraction while you’re working out. I can totally zone out during an episode of Law & Order: SVU. Before I know it, I’ve been doing squats for, like, five minutes straight!
Tell yourself, “I’ll do arm lifts until the next commercial break” or “I’ll do crunches until the Orange Is the New Black theme song is over.” (That theme song is really long, FYI. Enjoy your abs.)
4. Do Something Fun Outside
Most of the time, I like to trick my body into working out by disguising physical activity as things called “adventures.” It’s like when you have to give your dog medicine so you have to hide it in a spoonful of peanut butter first, you know?
Commit to doing some sort of outdoor activity once a month, or as often as you can. The world of nature is very cool and offers tons of fun things you can do for free! Go for a hike, organize a pickup soccer game with your friends, rent a bike and ride around for a few hours.
It’s easy to get bored or intimidated by the idea of “working out,” but being physically active can be easy, fun, and free. I want all of us to be hot and live forever, so staying fit and healthy is paramount to my desires for us. Now you tell me how you do it.
- Do you hate working out, too?
- What’s your favorite way to sneak fitness into your day?
- Let’s all share our favorite song to laughably dance alone to.