I totally hate New Year’s Eve. I hate to be a giant killjoy vulture girl, but I rarely ever have fun. This year, I’ll probably stay in and babysit my friend’s kid.
But YOU shouldn’t do that! You should go out and have all the fun for me, and you should probably be wearing a lot of body shimmer whilst doing so.
Notice I said shimmer. I did not say glitter. I am definitely not knocking the Art Stuff roll-ons of our youth or the amazing Hot Topic glitter paint my cheer squad used to use as liquid eyeliner. (I definitely ventured into Hot Topic while researching this piece and was saddened to find they don’t sell that stuff anymore. It was genius!) But we are grown women, and we can do whatever we want, which, in my case means piling on the shimmer. Who cares if your sequins are fighting for attention with your skin? It’s New Year’s Eve. Live a little.
I tried a handful of shimmers for you beauties, so you have no excuse not to get a little sexy to ring in 2014.
LUSH Shimmy Shimmy
The Shimmy Shimmy bar promises glowing golden skin, and that’s what you get. It’s a heart-shaped solid; to be honest, it reminds me of a stick of butter. That’s kind of a weird sensation as you rub it all over your body.
I used it on my shoulders, clavicle and right above my boobs. It claims to smell like lavender and vanilla, but to me it’s pure Play-Doh. I did like the subtle sparkle it imparted.
Lasting power: About two hours, less if you’re sweating on a dance floor.
Nuxe Huile Prodigieuse
I can’t afford this stuff, but I’ve been hoarding my Birchbox sample for, like, a year because I enjoy it so much.
It smells divinely of monoi (aka Tahitian gardenias) and glides across my skin with the loveliest golden shimmer, so even in the dead of winter, I feel like a sexy, tan beach goddess.
It’s a dry oil that you can also use in your hair for extra softness and shine. I like this one because it FEELS expensive. In 2014, we should all be fancier!
Lasting power: Three hours-ish.
NARS Illuminator in Copacabana
I love the Multiple version of this pearly, icy shade so much that I bought the liquid version, too.
This one looks fantastic on super-pale winter skin and darker tones. There’s just a hint of pink so it feels lifelike, not ghostly. The shimmer is subtle, but definitely noticeable. I wear it on my cheekbones and cupid’s bow, obviously, but I also like it on my clavicles. It catches the light in such a romantic, angelic manner. Wear this one if you’re going on a fancy dinner date for New Year’s.
Lasting power: More than four hours.
Bodycology “Heavenly Love” Sheer Musk & Peony Shimmer Mist
I felt the need to harken back to days of yore with an old-school drugstore shimmer spray. To my surprise, I liked it a lot. It smells pretty great, a little floral and musky but definitely not juvenile.
For something I bought at Walmart, the shimmer lasted a really long time on my skin. I liked the teeny-tiny silver sparkles a lot; they weren’t tacky and chunky glitter particles. It reminded me of Benefit’s sadly discontinued Kitten powder. (RIP. Nothing good ever lasts!)
Lasting power: I could see silver sparkles even after seven hours.
CrazyGirl Diva Dust in Gold
My favorite shimmer powder was this amazing Too Faced stuff to create the illusion of perfect contoured cleavage, but it’s discontinued. I’ve been trying to replace it because my supply is running low, and that makes me super sad.
This powder, readily available at sex shops and stripper stores (aka heaven), claims to contain “sex attractants.” I’m not sure what that means or if it works because I am, how you say, the seeengle girl (obscure Sex and the City reference). It does provide a nice gold sparkle to bare skin, which is sexy in itself.
Lasting power: About three hours.
Are you gonna sparkle on NYE? Are you planning to party your pants off? Let me live vicariously through you.