Only One Of Us Wore Antiperspirant To Face Our Karaoke Fears

The mere thought of singing in front of strangers stresses us out, and Pia found out just how much that stress affects her armpits.
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Pia and Runa
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The mere thought of singing in front of strangers stresses us out, and Pia found out just how much that stress affects her armpits.

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So you might think that because we spill our guts to all of you guys about our experiences with beauty--be they good, bad, or downright weird--that we’re the outgoing, extroverted, can’t-keep-anything-to-ourselves types. Truth is, with the exception of the occasional outburst from Pia (she’s always had a flair for the dramatic), we’re quite shy. Almost painfully so.

Seriously, if you put Pia and me in a room full of strangers, we latch onto each other and almost become a single entity, retreating a bit until one of us makes the first move and talks to someone else (which we usually agree upon in hushed whispers).

"Should we talk to that person?"
"That's a mannequin."
"Perfect."

"Should we talk to that person?" "That's a mannequin." "Perfect."

If you’re a twin, you might know what we’re talking about. When we graduated from preschool, they had to walk us up the aisle to get our diplomas together, both crying our little eyes out while we held hands tightly, pushing each other forward one step at a time. Adorable, we know, but really annoying for the guy trying to keep time on the piano.

Now that we’re older we can pretty much hold our own, but there are still some things that we feel pretty uncomfortable doing, and most involve public speaking or performing. So when Secret Antiperspirant schooled us on stress and sweat and then dared us to do something that would stress us out, Marci suggested karaoke.

And. We. Freaked.

See, we’ll never be the ones jumping up for the microphone, and we generally feel uncomfortable doing it until we get into it (and by “it” we mean liquid courage).

We’ve sang karaoke before, but usually it’s in NYC's K-Town at 1am after a full night of partying, in one of those rented rooms all your friends can hang out in, no strangers allowed. We just keep passing the microphone over to friends hoping no one yells, “Hey you guys should totally do a duet!” But sober karaoke in a general area? Scary.

Also, Pia would rather slather herself in maple syrup than go outside on a hot day without antiperspirant/deodorant. Did I mention that for this challenge, THEY WOULDN’T LET HER WEAR ANY?

So, basically, I had a better time than poor Pia.

Awkward.

Awkward.

See, when you sweat from stress, the odor is worse than when you sweat from being active or just feeling too hot. It even comes from different glands in your body--the apocrine glands, which Pia has now renamed the apocalypse glands.

I wore Secret Clinical Strength Stress Response, which addresses stress sweat differently than your everyday antiperspirant. It doesn’t cover up odor--it puts it on lockdown, neutralizing it and releasing a fresh scent. Kind of amazing because I didn’t think deodorants were all that smart.

So if you’re giving a presentation and wondering why you stink and your armpits are drenched, it’s because YOUR APOCRINE GLANDS HAVE A MIND OF THEIR OWN, and yeah, we’re totally weirded out by that.

PIA’S TAKE

So I was the guinea pig AGAIN.

We both had to push each other to get up and sing, and let me tell you, it wasn’t easy. Yeah, there were, like, three whole people in the room besides us, and a friend, but that’s really just too much.

After a few… uh… beverages (Marci dared us to do it sober, but we cheated just enough to take the edge off), we got up and attempted a duet.

Runa got way more into it. It’s been years since she’s been to karaoke, but now she suddenly likes it and wants to go more. I will not, so she’s going to have to make more friends.

Anyway, we were both pretty uncomfortable at first. It felt warm and there were people and I felt like I was back in elementary school having to recite my lines as the happy tree or whatever in our school play. I wanted to take off my blazer and throw it over my head, but that wouldn’t have been a good idea because I was all nervous and hot and not having fun at all, partly because I was all sweaty and smelly under that blazer.

Runa felt hot, too, and tried to take the attention off of me by taking her jacket thingy off, which made me look more hot and stuffy.

Can you tell we're singing "Zoot Suit Riot"? Well, Pia's just sort of mumbling it.

Can you tell we're singing "Zoot Suit Riot"? Well, Pia's just sort of mumbling it.

But she wasn’t sweaty--not a drop. Consequently, she didn't stink. It worked! She said she was nervous but turned that into adrenaline.

Our performance was mediocre, and you won’t be seeing us on Idol anytime soon. But it was good for us to face one of our fears, which I’ll probably have to do more often now that I have a karaoke-happy sister.

What situations stress you out to the point of stinking?

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