This Week, WE'RE the Big Beauty News! (There's Other Stuff, Too, Though)

It's a special early edition of your weekly beauty news, because we're shamelessly self-important.
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It's a special early edition of your weekly beauty news, because we're shamelessly self-important.

It's not every day that you see Jane Pratt's face on xoVain, but it's a special occasion. I stole the photo from her xoJane Open Thread (on a Tuesday!) because I can't think of a better image to represent our awesome news. Both xoJane and, yes, center of the beauty universe in our own minds, xoVain, officially have a new home at Time Inc.! Yes, that Time Inc. We did it!

Shoutout to all the readers who are old enough to remember this before syndication.

Shoutout to all the readers who are old enough to remember this before syndication.

Here's a little of what Jane had to say about the acquisition if you haven't checked out the Open Thread yet:

Time Inc. was the first company I worked with on launching Jane Magazine however many years ago. It's been wild to be entering back in through that same guest check-in turnstile for these past few months of negotiations ... Obviously, Time has maintained their very good taste. And even more obviously, we are all ecstatic here in the not-for-very-much-longer xoJane and xoVain offices. 

It's true! I can't wait to not go to Times Square! We'll be moving into our new space way downtown in November, but don't worry—I'll still make sure the gears are doing whatever gears do (spin around with little metal teeth?) in the meantime, as my awesome contributors keep doing what contributors do (spin around with little metal teeth?).

Part of my duties are, of course, to continue bringing you a roundup of the latest beauty news every Wednesday, so now that the bestest news of the week is out of the way, here's the restest!

Pat McGrath's first makeup product launches tomorrow, and you probably won't buy it

It's not that you won't want the debut product from Pat McGrath Labs. It's just that, when GOLD 001 goes on sale at noon tomorrow on patmcgrath.com, only 1000 units of the metallic pressed pigment will be made available.

Gold 001 Kit.jpg

So, what exactly is GOLD 001? McGrath doesn't seem to want to categorize it, but the $40 product most closely resembles eyeshadow. However, it comes with a spatula and Mehron mixing liquid to achieve its full wherever-you-want-to-apply-it potential, much like it was used for Prada's Spring 2016 show.

“The resulting look is liquid-like, a gilded glaze of intense color,” the legendary makeup artist said in a press release.

I wish you luck should you attempt to buy GOLD 001 tomorrow, but just in case you don't succeed, you can always try Trista's eye-gloss hack with a gold shadow to get a similar look.

Whatever you do, don't try buying GOLD 001—or any makeup—from an unauthorized retailer

Do you like your beauty products to contain natural ingredients? You're in luck! When you buy makeup online from unauthorized retailers through sites like eBay or Amazon, not only could they be knockoffs, they could contain natural "ingredients" like arsenic, cyanide and rat doody.

That's what Homeland Security Special Agent Nick Annan told Atlanta's WXIA about the knockoff products coming into the US, usually from China. 

"That's not the sort of thing you want to rub on your face or your lips when you go to buy a product," said Annan, whose other job title is Captain Obvious.

Even if you don't end up with rat turds on your face, knockoffs fall short in other, less-disgusting ways, like being of inferior quality, coming in smaller containers, and smelling kind of funky.

Your best bet? Buy the real thing from an authorized retailer. You may spend more, but you'll save yourself from stinky poison poo face—and that's priceless.

More MAC news: Ariana Grande is the next Viva Glam gal

VGSPRING16_Lineup LOWRES.jpg

Do you prefer dark, matte purple lipstick or pale, shimmery pink gloss? Either way, you're an Ariana Grande fan now. SURPRISE! 

MAC announced on Tuesday that the pop-singing actor-person is the 2016 Viva Glam spokesperson, which means the Lipstick and Lipglass above will be available come January. 

Is it just me, or does MAC announce something beauty-newsworthy, like, every week? 

I'm so glad granny-panty-see-through-skirt combos are back in style.

I'm so glad granny-panty-see-through-skirt combos are back in style.

Kim Kardashian idolizes Charlotte Tilbury for a kind of disheartening reason

Awesome reasons to admire Charlotte Tilbury include her fantastic makeup-artist skills and her entrepreneurship. Not-so-awesome reasons? Hiding her natural face from someone who's supposed to loves her unconditionally. (Unconditionally means with or without makeup, FYI. Saved you a trip to the dictionary.)

"Charlotte Tilbury is my hero because she has never let her husband see her without makeup on," Kim Kardashian told the audience at Monday night's InStyle Awards. "She sleeps with her makeup on. She's my idol."

I mean, you do you, but something about not letting your spouse see you without makeup—to the point that you sleep in it—gives me the Feminist Sads. It's not that I'm of the mindset that makeup is misleading; I just hate the idea that someone would be afraid or unwilling to be seen just the way they are by someone that close to them. But at least Kim went on to celebrate some of Charlotte's professional attributes.

“Charlotte is also one of the most energetic people," she continued. "The person who is doing your makeup is so in your personal space, and she makes you feel like you're her sister, but is so professional. She believes that makeup makes you feel empowered and confident, and I love that about her."

This hilarious hairstyle catalogue solves a nonexistent problem

I can't remember the last time I looked through one of those hairstyle-idea books in order to decide on a cut. Hell, I can't even remember the last time I went to a salon that has one of those. But, according to RocketNews24, someone in Japan was tired of looking through them and thinking, I love this haircut, but of course it looks good on this way-above-average-looking model. What about average-looking ME?

The result is BUSA Hair, a catalogue of hairstyles modeled by non-models. In fact, busa reportedly means ugly, but honestly, the people pictured aren't ugly—they're average-looking folks making wonderfully awkward faces.

That's some damn cute hair.

That's some damn cute hair.

The best part, though, may be the names of some of the haircuts when you run the site through Google Translate: soft Mohican to complement the wild impression, mash-to-block in the bundle feeling and hair flow, atmosphere MAX mash, balance outstanding small face and sharp berry short, etc. 

  • Which Ariana Granda Viva Glam product are you more likely to buy? 
  • Are you going to try to get your hands on GOLD 001? 
  • Have you ever inadvertently bought knockoff makeup? 
  • Are we being trolled by Japanese hairstylists?