I've been in a super-important XO meeting all afternoon, and while I can't tell you the awesome stuff we talked about, I can tell you that it went long and I ran out of time to write a cutesy intro to this week's beauty news.
LET'S GET TO IT.
Miley Cyrus is having quite the creative week in hairstyles.
Personally, I don't follow Miley Cyrus's Instagram account. I'm 36. But it has come to my attention that, over the last few days, her hair has gone through a rapid series of looks that are... uh... not subtle?
First, there was the hangover-curing rainbow streak and matching barrette...
Then she seemed to put on the colorful clip-ins that come with old Lady Lovely Locks dolls. (Joint sold separately.)
She kept it bright by piling up multicolored dread extensions into a beehive-y thing that was, contrary to the caption, neither Rasta nor real...
Next, a long, straight, mint green wig...
Then the "if Britney had dreads in the 'Baby One More Time' video" look...
And just earlier today, she started the "weed poof" trend...
I'm waiting with bated breath for the next look. But I'm still not going to follow her.
Urban Decay's founder announced the next Vice palette with the most epic arm swatch ever.
The NAKED palette isn't the only Urban Decay franchise that keeps coming out with sequels. They're launching Vice 4, the latest super-colorful eyeshadow palette, which would pair beautifully with Miley's recent hairdos.
To get fans ridonkulously excited about the new shades, brand founder Wende Zomnir posted a mouthwatering line of swatches on her forearm.
Ariel Winter got a breast reduction, and some of the reasons will make you want to punch media in the face.
Seventeen-year-old Ariel Winter, known for playing brainy daughter Alex Dunphy on Modern Family, opened up to Glamour about the breast reduction she underwent in early June, and while some of her reasons are very relatable to many women who have gotten or are considering getting a breast reduction—"It started to hurt so bad that I couldn’t take the pain"—some of the reasons are depressingly specific to being in the spotlight.
"Every article that has to do with me on a red carpet always had to do with 'Ariel Winter’s Crazy Cleavage!' Or 'Ariel Winter Shows Huge Boobs At An Event!' That’s all people would recognize me by, not, 'Oh, she does great work on Modern Family,'" she said. "It made me feel really uncomfortable because as women in the industry, we are totally over sexualized and treated like objects."
And she's right: women, famous and not famous, are objectified like crazy. But what she doesn't directly mention—and what creeps me the eff out—is how willing mainstream media outlets were to talk about a child's boobs. Like when E! dedicated an entire article to then-not-yet-16-year-old Ariel's breasts, with the headline, "Ariel Winter's Cleavage Is Out of Control on the SAG Awards Red Carpet." I don't care if she seemed to be confidently flaunting them; if it would be creepy for an adult man to comment on, it's creepy for an article.
Jessica Alba's high school look was NOT her Alex Mack look.
Remember when Jessica Alba played the mean, popular girl on The Secret Life of Alex Mack who looked exactly like every mean, popular girl of the '90s?
According to a new Allure interview, that was totally not her IRL look. Apparently, she was into "Nineties grunge. Doc Martens. I got my bellybutton pierced the second I could. I wanted to shave my head and pierce my nose, and my mom said she was going to make me stop acting."
She also talked about the worst beauty advice she's ever gotten (piling on foundation), her biggest skin issue (dryness), and how she doesn't do masks around her husband because "it shocks him." Get over it, Mr. Alba.
- Would you try any of Miley's hairstyles?
- Are you planning to get the Vice 4 palette?
- What was YOUR look in high school?