I recently decided to try growing my nails long. After years of keeping them relatively short, I wanted to have long nails that I could cover with crazy nail art. Nevermind the fact that I don’t really have the patience for crazy nail art. It’s just nice to have the option, you know?
Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like long nails are in the cards for me. I would get three or four nails on each hand to be long and perfectly filed, then admire them while tapping them loudly on every nearby surface. Unfortunately, my index-finger nails never made it past their usual length without breaking, and eventually, all the other nails would follow suit. I guess I just have really weak nails. OK, I KNOW I have really weak nails. It’s a problem.
Then I figured that if I couldn’t grow long nails, I could just buy some. I found a pack of ridiculously long, fruit-covered fake nails at Forever 21 for $3 and knew my life would never be complete if I left them there. So I bought them, and wore them... for exactly one day.
The instructions said they could stay on for a week, which I think is pretty good for $3 nails. I obviously did not get my money’s worth, but I did learn a valuable lesson: insanely long nails are not for me. I couldn’t pick up my phone, or text, or type, or touch my face without scratching it, or go near my eyes without almost gouging them out. I asked way too many people to help me with the process of getting dressed and undressed. I couldn’t even put pomade in my hair without getting it all stuck under the nails (ew). Getting the nails off was a nightmare, too.
Suffice it to say that I’ve given up on having long nails. That doesn’t mean I can’t have some crazy nail art, though!
I got the inspiration to decorate my nails in sort of a roundabout way. After finally getting the fake nails off, I was left with dried glue all over my nails. Instead of being a normal person and trying to remove the glue, I figured I’d just cover it up with some polish.
Did my polish go on smoothly? Of course not. That is how it became extremely necessary to stick even more things on top of my nails to distract from the carnage left over from my previous bad choices. It’s a dangerous cycle.
I did a sort of glam, pretty look as well as one that might be better suited for an eight-year-old but whatever. We’ll start with the pretty nails first, because I want to save the adorable ones for last.
These are just some rhinestones that I found at the arts and crafts store near me. They’re on adhesive backing, so I just cut out whichever ones I wanted and added a bit of nail glue for extra hold, then stuck them on my nails randomly. I used the nail glue that came with my fake nails, which worked fine. I’ve also used Nailene Super Glue Nail Glue in the past and that stuff works really well.
I used Onyx by Sally Hansen for the black background and The Gold & The Beautiful by Wet ‘n’ Wild for some extra gold shimmer. You could do as many different nail polish/rhinestone color combinations as your heart desires.
Now for some adorableness! This was also an arts and crafts store find. They had tons of tiny appliques: lilacs, fruit, sports, birthday candles--you get the idea. It was hard to pick just one but in the end I chose a pack with bees and flowers.
I don’t know what normal people use these appliques for, but most of them were the perfect size for fingernails. I just glued them on top of a pretty yellow background (Midtown Mimosa by NYC) and voila, the cutest nails ever.
I’m honestly not sure how everyone else in the world does nail art, but I’m pretty happy with this method. The rhinestones and appliques were only a few dollars, and the application couldn’t be easier: just glue them on. There’s no painstakingly painting bees with shaky hands--and the best part is that it totally works for girls with short nails, too.
What do you think? Are you going to the arts and crafts store the next time you want to decorate your nails, or have you been doing this for ages already? And if you don’t care about nail art, can we have a book discussion in the comments instead? I totally knew that the thing that happened to Bernadette was going to happen, because duh; I haven’t started The Cuckoo’s Calling yet because I’m too excited (I did that with new Harry Potter books, too, when I was a kid).