6 Awful Truths About Going Bleach Blonde

Barbie doll hair ain't easy. Let me share some perils of platinum.
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Mari
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Barbie doll hair ain't easy. Let me share some perils of platinum.

As I sit here at my current incarnation of blonde (a darker, ashier, 'rootier' tone than in these photos), I start to think about the beauty ordeal it took to get here. I know I’ve sung nothing but praises for blondeness, but truthfully, there are downsides to bleach.

Here’s the bad news for anyone considering the bleach blonde plunge.

The Dryness

No matter what, your hair will be drier than when you started. While this can be aided by oils and masks, there are times you just miss the ease that comes with treating your natural hair.

The Breakage

bleach blonde hair

There Will Be Breakage, a film by Paul Thomas Anderson.

Luckily, this probably won’t be noticeable to anyone but yourself. Again, this can be aided by hair masks. My favorites are the ones that include keratin, which helps make hair stronger and less prone to snapping off when you're singing emotional ballads in the shower while shampooing.

The Scalp Burns

While it hasn’t happened too often, my head has been set ablaze by the unforgiving fury of bleach. After the sting, you are treated to a lovely head of scabs and/or what seems to feel like a thickened scalp, which will delightfully crust off your head. Bonus: they’re fun to pick at. I mean, if you like that sort of thing.

The Need For Makeup

covering face blonde

No, I'm not ready for my closeup.

Though I initially wanted to aim for pure platinum, I found that the lighter I got, the worse I looked without makeup. Every morning when I woke up to brush my teeth I was haunted by a small, pale, haggard ghost in front of the mirror.

Smack on some color and the look is great, but when I want to go sans makeup, it’s a bit of a bummer. I realize this won’t apply to everyone, but it may take a while to find your right shade of blonde.

The Weird Texture When Wet

It kind of feels like wet fabric.

The Roots

blonde hair black roots

Ugh.

The worst.

Do I Regret It?

Not a chance.

Not a chance.

I’ve always been experimental with my hair (sadly, there’s plenty of photographic evidence), and blonde is no different. Even if it’s not a permanent look, you’ll never know unless you try, right?

  • Was your bleached hair worth it?
  • If you're thinking about it, what's stopping you?