I’m the laziest beauty writer in the world. THERE. I SAID IT. I’m always looking for a faster way to get something beauty-related done, and I’m more than happy to slap some sunscreen on my face call it a day. That doesn’t mean I don’t love beauty and its many rituals. I just love not overexerting myself when it’s not necessary, too.
This is why I also love hats. If you don’t have time to wash your hair, throw on a hat! Society will accept you! If you’re too lazy to straighten your whole head of hair, put on a hat that covers the parts you couldn’t be bothered to iron. Someone will compliment you!
It’s the idle girl’s solution to looking downright adorable, and I’ve got some easy-peasy-lemon-lazy hairstyle tips for the various types of hats you may have waiting for you on your slothiest days.
THE BASEBALL CAP WITH LOOSE CURLS
Whenever I throw on a baseball cap, people inevitably come up to me to talk about sports. PEOPLE: I just think I look hot in a baseball cap--I really don’t know anything about sports. (I recently asked my boyfriend, “Is the Super Bowl football or basketball?” I win, I know.) What they should actually talk to me about is how limp my roots look, because that’s probably why I’m wearing one.
If your roots look lifeless, do as I do and throw on a baseball cap. You probably look hot in one, too. Up the hotness by leaving your hair down and wavy. My hair’s curls actually look like this, so I don’t have to do much to the rest of my hair. If your hair doesn’t do this but you want loose curls, you can divide your hair in two like you’re going to tie pigtails, bun your hair tightly and let your hair sit in its own oils for a bit.
THE FELT FEDORA WITH A MESSY SIDE PONYTAIL
Got a meeting and no time to wash the hair you haven’t washed in days? Tie your hair in a side ponytail. Then take a little section of your hair and pin it up around where your hair tie is. This doesn’t even deserve a second paragraph.
THE FUNKY BERET YOU PROBABLY DON'T HAVE WITH PIGTAILS
I love loose pigtails even though I have friends that disapprove. Guess what: don’t care.
This weird, structural beret from United Nude would look great with a monocle, but I think it looks even better with (apparently controversial) pigtails. It’s like I’m cool and badass, but I’m also super-cute (or I try to be, but in a doesn't-look-like-I-try way).
I'd like to think you guys already know hot to put your hair in low pigtails, but just in case, check out Annie’s Lara Stone-inspired pigtail tutorial.
THE HEADBAND WITH THE EMILY MCCOMBS BUMP™
I know, a headband isn’t a hat, but this is too cute not to include.
I was rocking headbands long before Blair Warldorf did on the steps of the Met (yes, we get American shows in Singapore), but only recently did I realize how to take it to the next level: Emily’s holy hair bump. It doesn't even completely fit in the picture! It reigns supreme over all hair bumps, scoffs at bumpits, and gives stink eyes to crybaby bumps like mine, in this photo.
When you feel compelled to have a headband on your head, think, ‘What would Emily do?’ and then backcomb the rest of your hair so tall that you get recruited by the WNBA. (I had to ask my boyfriend if that reference made sense.)
What’s your favorite hair/head-accessory combo? What else do you put in your hair other than hats and headbands? Do I even want to know?