3 Cute Ways To Keep Your Bangs Off Your Sweaty Forehead

One of which is called the "bitch flip," which we really need to MAKE HAPPEN. Seriously: #bitchflip
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Marie
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One of which is called the "bitch flip," which we really need to MAKE HAPPEN. Seriously: #bitchflip

FINALLY! I can write to you about ways to wear your bangs during the summer!

See, the day that I had the idea for this article, I cut my hand open on a piece of glass that was jutting out of a trashcan. In retrospect, maybe I should have gone to the hospital to get stitches.

For a few days, I couldn't move my middle finger without pulling on the skin, leaving the cut open and bleeding again. I tried to be careful; I even asked somebody to help me wash my hair! I showered with my left hand out of the water, my girlfriend stepping in to help me.

Sounds sexy? Not really. People with short hair know nothing about washing long hair. Also, you should have seen me trying to blow dry and straighten my hair! E.T. would have done a better job.

Anyway, I'm OK now. As soon as the cut was somewhat healed, I put myself to the task of trying to look good with my bangs out of my face. The weather is not insufferably hot yet, but I want to have some options before it gets crazy.

I've had bangs for a while now--something like 10 years. Most of my friends have known me with this haircut. I'm the girl with bangs, HI! I have no intention of getting rid of them, but I must admit I get annoyed with them every summer, and the idea of letting them grow out crosses my mind.

Recently, everyone was talking about Zooey Deschanel being "unrecognizable" when she pushed her bangs to the side for the Met Gala. Her fans pleaded for the return of her cute fringe half-obstructing her cute blue eyes.

Going sans bangs, I was expecting a similar reaction from my friends: “Marie, what a big forehead you have!” and other charming critiques of the sort.

So I started this experience by posting a picture on Facebook, bangs simply pushed back. I was surprised to read the comments: people seemed to love it!

And they loved it IN FRENCH.

And they loved it IN FRENCH.

But that was only step one. Step two was to braid my bangs across my forehead, a hairstyle I think we've all seen on ladies with luscious hair.

With my tiny (and super straight) bangs, I must say that the results were... different. I felt like a ballerina or an ice skater, my forehead exposed to the glares of strangers, gleaming in the afternoon sun (ew).

I admit, it freaked me out. What do you think? (Of the braid, not the bandage.)

I admit, it freaked me out. What do you think? (Of the braid, not the bandage.)

I felt naked, so I quickly got rid of the French braid, and executed the next style I had in mind.

Ladies, I present you what Urban Dictionary calls the “bitch flip.”

#bitchflip

#bitchflip

It's kind of like a less intense version of the bangs we had in the 80s/90s. I mean, the bangs that some people had. Not me. My mom really sucked at hair styling, so I simply wore my hair down all the time, all limp and not interesting. Unlike some other girls... *cough* Kelly Kapowski *cough*

Here's how I did the bitch flip: I started by spraying some dry shampoo, then combing the bangs on the side. I tried to add a little bit of volume by combing them upwards, and kinda just letting them fall back on the side. I finished with some hairspray.

Obviously, it's not as intense as it could be. I guess that's because my hair is fine; on someone with thicker hair, the results might be more KAPOWski.

Finally, I did what I do best when there's a heat wave: I grabbed my sunglasses and casually wore them on the top of my head, holding my bangs in place. There's no way I would do this just for style; it's obviously just a trick to survive the hot weather.

I said 3 three CUTE ways, not 3 COMPLICATED ways.

I said 3 three CUTE ways, not 3 COMPLICATED ways.

How do you deal with bangs in the summer? Or do you call them fringe? In my head, fringe is somehow longer and more layered; bangs are more straight and thick, right across your forehead... Does this make sense? Any bitch-flippers out there?